Man is a social being. Therefore, from birth, our actions, skills, thoughts are under the guns of others. Further, in the process of growing up, we ourselves begin to evaluate our capabilities and our place in life. This determines the two main factors under the influence of which a person’s self-esteem is formed:

1. External. That is, the attitude of others (upbringing, social environment, intimate and personal communication, the influence of the team, occupation, media and information technology, etc.).
2. Interior. Attitude towards oneself (features of character and appearance, abilities, level of intelligence, susceptibility to criticism, level of claims, etc.).

The quality of his life depends on how confident a person is in himself and his abilities, how realistic he perceives the attitude of others. That is, success, material condition, peace of mind and personal relationships. This affects the formation of behavioral models - reactions to criticism, failures, successful decisions, non-standard situations, the ability to take a chance.

It is quite logical that it is very difficult for a person who doubts his worth to succeed in any area of ​​life. An insecure layman cannot be happy by definition - after all, he is not sure that he deserves it. It is difficult for him to make important decisions and put up with the shortcomings that are inherent in all of us.

At the same time, low self-esteem prevents not only today's happiness - it does not give a chance to develop in the future. It becomes a barrier to career growth, personal development, building relationships. The decision to change your life is often immediately blocked by the fear of failure. Pessimism and fear of change deprive such people of the opportunity to live a brighter and more enjoyable life.

The situation is aggravated by the “law of attraction of like”:

• First, an insecure person attracts the same losers;
• Secondly, a bad attitude and dislike for oneself form a similar attitude of others.

The main reasons for low self-esteem

Our formation of our own "I" and the place of this "I" in society is influenced by many factors. Let us dwell on the most dangerous ones, thanks to which low self-esteem appears. These include:

1. "Hard childhood". The seeds of self-doubt can be sown in a person as early as childhood. It is during this period that the main part of our self-esteem is made up of the judgments of others, since the child still cannot and does not know how to evaluate himself. That is, the base is given to us by close relatives - parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents, etc. Lack of attention, excess of criticism, indifference, high demands - all this can make an insecure child an insecure adult. The presence of physical disabilities or chronic diseases in a small person enhances the feeling of discomfort.
2. Sensitivity to the opinions of others. The inability to "sort" someone else's opinion about yourself and your actions is not the best friend for self-esteem. Our society has not yet got rid of such a vice as envy. Many people sin by predilection to criticize their neighbor. It is clear that such "advisers" and "well-wishers" can say a lot of bad and not always truthful things. Therefore, gullibility and excessive perception of everything that others say can significantly undermine self-confidence.
3. Excessive plank. An incorrectly set goal can put on oneself the stigma of a loser. It is difficult to achieve a goal if it is simply not within your power or if the time frame for achieving it is too short. Such an inadequate assessment of one's capabilities often leads to a fiasco. The goal is not achieved, self-esteem is at zero, the desire to move on disappears.
4. Focus on failure. It often happens that failure turns into new experience and opportunities. It is important to see it and accept it. Otherwise, there is a loop on an unpleasant event and programming yourself for failure.

Signs of low self-esteem

In fact, you can even recognize a person who needs an increase in self-esteem even by appearance. Stooping, drooping eyes, carelessness in clothing, stiffness often accompany self-doubt. But there are even more reliable signs of low self-esteem:

• Pessimism and negativism in speech. The problem with self-assessment is indicated by phrases (or thoughts) of the following meaning: “everything is bad”, “it’s impossible”, “I can’t cope”, “this is not for me”, “I don’t have the necessary knowledge (skills, experience)” and etc. Such people do not enter into serious debate, avoid responsible assignments and do not show initiative.
• perfectionism. Sometimes the desire to increase their worth in the eyes of others leads people with low self-esteem to desperately try to do something better than others. It can be appearance, housekeeping, professional activity. They get hung up on the details, while missing the overall result. They hope that by approaching the ideal, they will become more loved and significant. However, the path to the ideal (which does not exist) can take all the time and effort, leaving nothing for the realization of real desires and peaks.
• Loneliness. A notorious individual feels uncomfortable in society, especially among unfamiliar or unfamiliar people. The rejection of communication can manifest itself as alienation, as well as aggressiveness, assertiveness of behavior, which themselves repel others, despite the fact that a successful person not only seeks to acquire connections, but also makes them work for themselves.
• Fear of change. Risk is a taboo for an insecure person. Everything new is unknown and therefore dangerous. Such a fear of changing something in one's life can be disguised as modesty, timidity, shyness, conformism.
• Developed sense of guilt. For an insecure person, taking responsibility for failure is another way to validate their status as a failure. At the same time, if he takes the blame for what he did not do, and even apologizes, there can be no doubt about low self-esteem.
• Fear of criticism. Criticism for an insecure person is a knife to the very heart of his self-esteem. For him, this is not a constructive "debriefing", as it is perceived by a self-confident person, but another proof of inferiority. He not only reacts very sensitively to her, but also goes in cycles for a long time, constantly scrolling through the situation and the unpleasant words spoken in his direction. Over time, negative emotions weaken the sense of reality, and any, even unjustified criticism is perceived very painfully.
• Self pity. Convincing yourself and others about how unfair the world, fate, people, circumstances, nature is is a great way to shift responsibility for your life to others. Constant complaints, illnesses and moaning about fate can give the much-desired attention of others. However, the abuse of the "poor me" syndrome over time can have the opposite effect - the desire to regret and help others will be replaced by irritation and ignoring your passivity and inactivity.
• Failure to make decisions. Having to make a decision quickly, especially for others, is a nightmare for a person with low self-esteem. Uncertainty in himself and his abilities makes him doubt any solution and analyze even insignificant details. Because of this, internal tension, feelings of discomfort and nervousness increase. Therefore, such people try to avoid leadership positions, and if they occupy them, they feel uncomfortable. Decision-making is either shelved, or shifted to another, or ignored altogether.
• Limitation of Interest. It is difficult for a victim of low self-esteem to decide to change something in himself. Change of image, outdoor activities - this may remain a dream buried under fear of rejection and condemnation. Sometimes such people are even afraid to start playing sports: people will watch on the street, in the sports club - people too, moreover, stronger and more beautiful. Plus, there are some trainers to learn. That is, the fear of inconsistency and the fear of doing something wrong comes into play.
• Public play. Sometimes insecure people cover up their complexes with bright masks - familiar behavior, outrageousness, loud speech or laughter, their connections, place in society or level of well-being.
• Problems in personal life. Often, low self-esteem is the main cause of dysfunctional relationships. A self-respecting person will not tolerate humiliation, betrayal and lies, unlike a self-deprecating one. It is very difficult to get love and respect if a person is sure that he is not worthy of it. This prevents him from fighting for his happiness.
• Depressive states and bad mood. It is difficult for an insecure person to accept the shortcomings of both their own and others. Therefore, he is either quietly sad, or is constantly irritated by everything: the country, colleagues, neighbors, spouse, children. Dissatisfaction with oneself can be transformed into cynicism and excessive criticality. He does not see the positive because he focuses on the negative.

Important! When criticizing, remember the psychological truth - we condemn in others exactly what we ourselves sin. And if you suddenly want to criticize someone - remember the mote in someone else's eye.

How to increase self-esteem

Our self-esteem can be compared with immunity, the higher it is, the stronger our resistance to various life situations. Conversely, the lower our self-confidence, the more difficult it is to cope even with minor domestic troubles. Today, there are many ways to raise self-esteem through training, affirmations, meditations, changing behavior patterns, etc. We will consider the most effective and at the same time as simple as possible methods for raising the level of self-confidence.

How to increase self-esteem in a man

A man by nature cannot be weak - otherwise he will not survive and will not give (grow) his offspring. Therefore, even a modern representative of the stronger sex has at least 3 reasons to keep their self-esteem in good shape - this is a career (work should bring prosperity), love (strong and self-confident men are still in favor) and success (luck loves the successful).

TOP 10 ways to increase a man's self-esteem:

1. Learn to Accept Failure. Do not scold yourself for wrong actions, unfinished work or hasty decisions - analyze the situation, draw conclusions. Replenish your piggy bank of experience - and no more. I made a mistake, I realized, and - we go further!
2. Keep your mind and body in good shape. Agree - athletic erudite men have much less reason (and time) for cultivating their complexes. And, again, do not forget your nature: excess adrenaline and aggressive male energy must be periodically dumped. Not to mention staying in shape. And sport is the perfect choice for the modern man. When it comes to being well-read, you don't have to know everything. It's unrealistic. It is better to choose and master the area that interests you. Interest can only be caused by a person who is interested in something.
3. Respect yourself and your time. Analyze the attitude of those around you. If you have friends or acquaintances who do not miss the opportunity to assert themselves at your expense or take advantage of your reliability, refuse to communicate with them. Do not be afraid to get rid of destructive relationships, good people are always there. You just need to bring them to life. The same principle applies to work: you are capable of more, but this is not appreciated - change jobs.
4. Don't compare yourself to others. Initially, all people are different, therefore, the needs and ways to meet these needs are different for everyone. Therefore, focus on your capabilities and desires. Set realistic goals and set deadlines to achieve them. Understanding this principle of action will save you from the temptation to compare yourself with others. Evaluate only yourself and your motivation in relation to your capabilities.
5. Rethink your social circle. To become more self-confident and successful, try to communicate with such people. Being in an atmosphere of success, ideas, positive emotions, you have every chance to "get infected" with the same. Unlike a society of chronic losers, where the degree of your self-esteem will only plummet.
6. Plan your time. The correct distribution of time will help not only to cope with business, but also to fully relax. Make it a rule to prepare for a new working day in advance, for example, making a plan of your actions for tomorrow in the evening.
7. Be decisive. Decisiveness is another natural trait of a man. Do not bury it under a pile of doubts and possible failures. Challenge yourself: set a goal and achieve it. Don't be afraid to make decisions. There is an opinion that every day gives us 10 chances to change our lives - use them!
8. Remember your successes. Choose a way to record your achievements (photos, notes in a separate notebook, a shelf with awards or frames on the wall) and review them in a moment of doubt. This will refresh the memory and emotions that accompanied your victories. And it will give you confidence.
9. Be positive and interested. Learn to see something positive in any person, event, act. Why willingly let negativity into your life? Feel free to expand your knowledge and skills with questions. Do not be ashamed to ask and find out. It is a shame not to ask and remain in the dark just because of this.
10. Love and respect yourself. You are a complete person, albeit with your own “nuances”. Either way, you deserve respect. And if you also love yourself, and you can translate the “nuances” into the status of virtues, then respect, success and love are simply provided for you.

How to boost a woman's self-esteem

Despite the fact that the requirements of nature for a woman are not as strict as for a man, self-doubt makes her no less unhappy. To remedy the situation, you can use the above "male" methods. But it is better to reinforce them with purely “feminine” tricks.

TOP 10 ways to increase a woman's self-esteem:

• Accept yourself for who you are. Your hair color, eye shape, figure and leg length - what is given by nature, an individual order. If you want to change something, change it, but carefully and only for yourself. And do not place great hopes on external changes if you do not change internally. Believe me, among beautiful women (thin, with big breasts, long hair - who has any concept of beauty) there are no less unfortunate ones. A woman is attracted not so much by her ideal appearance as by self-confidence.
• Don't envy. Envy is a bad feeling. She kills confidence. You cannot be happy for your girlfriend - concentrate on what only you have. On their successes and virtues.
• Take care of yourself. A truly attractive woman is a well-groomed woman. Love your body and show your love with care. Go in for sports, lead a healthy lifestyle, buy yourself beautiful high-quality clothes and shoes, and your reflection in the mirror will become a powerful stimulant for your self-esteem.
• Do not show initiative where it is not needed. Make it a rule not to prove your need with obsessive care or attention. Do not ask for help - do not help! Or offer it only when you really need it and carefully. Do not ask for advice - do not advise!
• Get Interesting. An effective way to increase self-esteem is to expand your circle of interests, going beyond glossy magazines, forums, social networks and TV shows. Analyze your usual "diet" of communication and remove from it such "GMOs" as gossip, whining and talking on the same topic (clothes, baby food, cuisine, etc.).
• Love compliments and interested looks. It is difficult for an insecure person to believe complements - they cause embarrassment and awkwardness. Not to mention the ambiguous views of the opposite sex. Learn not only to love yourself, let others love it too. Accept evidence of self-love with dignity. Give thanks for the compliments, keep the eyes of interest directed at you, but keep the boundaries. Vulgarity and familiarity have nothing to do with dignity.
• Keep your personal space. One of the secrets of the unique attractiveness of French women is the ability to preserve their identity and personal space. Make yourself your own "secret garden", where you can periodically retire for a couple of hours to be alone, restore your emotional balance. The best option is an interesting book in your hands and a bench in the park or a table in a cafe. It is equally important for French beauties not to dissolve their individuality in a husband, children or friends. After all, it was she who once attracted this man into her life, and it is she who is able to keep him.
• Minimize experiences. Life is too short to waste it on petty experiences. Believe in yourself, tune in to the positive, look at life on a larger scale.
• Be yourself. The desire to impress or please at the expense of qualities or behavior that are not inherent in you is harmful both to you and to others. First, you break yourself. Secondly, falsehood and hypocrisy are not noticed only by those who benefit from it, that is, those who do not need the real you.
• Get rid of criticism in yourself and to yourself. Accustom yourself to perceive any failures and incidents easily, with humor. Both their own and others. No one in the world is perfect, so look for only positive qualities. Both in yourself and in others.

How to increase self-esteem - look at the video:

How we treat ourselves is how others treat us. Low self-esteem is a syndrome that can lead to serious problems both in your career and in your personal life.

1. Perfectionism

Perfectionism can be both a manifestation of low self-esteem and its cause. A perfectionist who strives for non-existent perfection or simply high standards rarely gets satisfaction from his work and is therefore more susceptible to criticism. He strives to conform to the ideal image that he has created for himself, and, not achieving it, he experiences a feeling of disappointment in himself, up to contempt.

2. Speech

A person with low self-esteem constantly uses certain words in his speech.

Firstly, these are negative phrases expressing denial: “impossible, not sure, not ready, I do not have the appropriate knowledge; yes, but…”

Secondly, constant apologies. And thirdly, phrases that belittle the value of human actions and labor. Surely you are familiar with excuses: “I was just lucky”, “my colleagues did most of the work, and I just helped them”, and so on. People with low self-esteem do not perceive compliments and gratitude well, trying to immediately argue with praise and prove the opposite. Why? It's all about the guilt complex. It doesn't matter what. Perhaps the work was not done well enough in their opinion, or they made little effort to fulfill the request, even if they did it. Guilt is the next sign by which you can identify a person who does not think too much about himself.

3. Guilt

Feelings of guilt, like perfectionism, can be the cause of low self-esteem. As psychologist Darlene Lanser says, if a person feels deeply guilty and cannot forgive himself for this for a long time, he will constantly reproach himself for this, remind him of his “burden on his heart” and be constantly ashamed of his actions. Ultimately, he will lose self-respect and with it self-esteem.

The relationship can also be reversed. A person with low self-esteem suffers from constant self-criticism and is not able to adequately perceive the mistakes of the past. Hence the neurotic guilt in insecure people

4. Depression

According to a study by a doctor of psychological sciences, Lars Madslen, self-doubt can also be the cause of frequent depression or a constant bad mood. According to her, self-esteem is the key to both development and recovery from depression, which is considered a serious psychological problem.

5. Excuses

People with low self-esteem tend to justify others, even if their actions are contrary to all norms of behavior. Usually they argue that everyone has their own circumstances, that everyone can be understood. Psychologists explain this position as an attempt to avoid criticism, which can be encountered when judging others.

6. Lack of initiative

What really hinders people with low self-esteem in the professional field is the lack of initiative. Such a person, having received certain powers, will, at any opportunity, transfer them into the wrong hands. No wonder, because he is not sure that he will cope with his task, even if he is an “ace” in his field. In a dispute with an interlocutor, he is also unlikely to be able to defend his position, preferring to agree with his opponent.

7. Indecision

Such people are not ready to bear responsibility for their decisions. They generally prefer not to decide anything. Suddenly they make a mistake, and the decision turns out to be wrong. In this case, it will not be possible to avoid criticism. The worst thing for insecure people is criticism of loved ones: relatives, friends, whom they are afraid of losing. After all, this, in their opinion, will be the price for the wrong decision.

8. Trying to avoid conflict

"Not sure, don't go." This is the attitude of people with low self-esteem. They are ready to do anything to avoid conflict situations or tensions between people. Everything should be harmonious, even if this is achieved through “white lies”, which sooner or later will lead to more serious problems.

9. Hostility

There is also the reverse side of the coin, when people with low self-esteem, on the contrary, show open hostility and cynicism towards others. This is just a variant of the defensive position, as they say: "the best way to defend is to attack."

10. Fatigue, insomnia, headache

Symptoms of low self-esteem can be not only psychological, but also physical. According to psychologists, extreme self-disappointment leads to chronic insomnia, fatigue, and headaches.

Good day dear blog readers!
Last time, we learned to define our own. Today, we will continue our conversation.

If there is no faith in oneself, and any action seems doomed in advance, then there is low self-esteem. If you start such a state and do nothing, then the result will be a complete helplessness of a person in life. There is no confidence in one's abilities and strengths - there is no movement forward. Why is this happening and what to do - read on!

• What is low self-esteem
• Causes
• Signs of Low Self-Esteem

What is low self-esteem

As you already understood, low self-esteem is an incorrect assessment of your abilities. It seems to a person that he is worse than he is. And worse than the rest. In this case, even a slight remark from others can cause a depressive state.

Moreover, if we value ourselves so low, then any adverse event (whether it be a minor criticism from the boss or the cancellation of a meeting with a friend) can greatly spoil the mood.

A person, instead of shrugging his shoulders and going about his business, will digest the situation again and again, each time blaming himself for what happened even more.

A distinctive feature of people with low self-esteem is that they are more willing to listen to criticism than compliments.

It sounds crazy, but the reason is simple: criticism only confirms their opinion of themselves. But in the case of receiving a compliment, it becomes unclear what is happening and what to do next with this compliment.

Causes

Before you start doing something, you should understand why a person has low self-esteem. Without understanding the source of the problem, it is difficult and almost impossible to solve it.

The reasons include:

• Childhood

If parents compare the baby with others, while the comparison is not for the better, then the grown child will also compare himself with others and at the same time look for why he is worse;

• Defeats in the past

If you tried something, but it didn’t work out and repeated itself several times, then this is quite enough to be completely disappointed in your abilities;

• Guilt

Being stuck in a feeling like guilt can lead to the destruction of an entire life. In this case, the person not only does not believe in himself, but also does not give himself the opportunity to do something because he is to blame.

Therefore, if you feel guilty, then you should definitely ask for forgiveness sincerely. Believe me, if you do this with all your heart, then you are unlikely to be forgiven;

• Procrastination or putting everything off until later

This is a fairly common occurrence in today's world. There are so many distractions around (for example, online games, unlimited access to series from all over the world, etc.) that a person puts off important things for the sake of entertainment.

But there is one caveat: when you put everything aside for a long time, sooner or later someone near you achieves something. As a result, you graze the rear, which cannot but affect the assessment of your capabilities;

• Striving for the ideal

There is too much information around us. And as a result, we strive for a fashionable figure, fashionable work. If this is not something for which there is talent and ability, then it is difficult to achieve this. As a result of success and self-confidence less and less.

Signs of Low Self-Esteem

Of course, we are all unique. However, in the behavior of people with low self-esteem, the following common features are observed:

1. indecisiveness. Most often it manifests itself in the form of the inability to make a choice. There is a fear of possible consequences if the choice is unsuccessful;
2. Avoidance of praise. Moreover, the person will also give several arguments in favor of the fact that he does not deserve encouragement at all;
3. High level of observation. Such people carefully monitor the reactions of other people to their actions. Subconsciously, in this way, they are looking for evidence that other people do not accept them;

The “symptoms” include the fact that insecure people quickly give up and rarely defend their position.

You also need to remember that low self-esteem can cause depression.

Another option: both overestimated and underestimated self-esteem.

This phenomenon most often occurs in people who have achieved success in one area, and unsuccessful in others. Then all the potential is realized in one direction. But from this disappointment due to the fact that nothing works in other areas only intensifies.

Worth mentioning about features of the manifestation of low self-esteem in women, men and children.

In women, low self-esteem is most often related to finding and choosing a partner.

For men, difficulties are encountered in professional development.

As for children, difficulties may arise in the process of socialization. Children simply do not believe that someone can be friends with them just like that. Therefore, they begin to look for a catch in everything and unconsciously move away from their peers.

In this case, the first thing the parents of the child need to do is to find out why this is happening and if nothing can be done on their own with the cause, then it is better to contact a child psychologist.

Ways to deal with low self-esteem

Knowing how to get rid of such self-doubt is necessary, even if everything is fine with self-esteem. Using the simple tricks that I will describe below, you can increase the self-confidence of your loved ones and relatives.

After all, for example, a husband with low self-esteem will constantly look for a reason why he cannot be loved. And under such conditions, discord in the family is guaranteed.

Psychological help for low self-esteem:

1. List of achievements. Each, even the smallest of your successes should be recorded in a special notebook. And in moments of special disbelief in yourself, re-read. When the list of successes becomes large, the moment comes when a person realizes that he is not such a loser as he imagined;
2. In another notebook, write down the things that bring you pleasure. And do at least one item from this list once a week. Consider this your reward;
3. Be sure to go in for sports. Intense physical activity contributes to the release of negativity. Moreover, during and after the occupation of forces, there will no longer be any more to look for flaws in oneself;
4. Find in your environment those who, when communicating with you, increase the level of motivation and make you want to move mountains. And strive for success by being close to them;
5. Practice meditation. Give yourself a few minutes every day just to relax. So you can reduce the level of stress and life will become much easier.

Remember that you need to use these techniques with low self-esteem. And you need to do them regularly. So you can see the dignity in yourself and understand that each person is unique and you are no worse than others.

So, today we talked about what low self-esteem is and how to deal with it. I hope that the information was useful to you. We have a lot of useful material ahead of us.

Therefore, subscribe to blog updates and share interesting materials with friends on social networks.

If you have any questions? Write in the comments, I will try to help you.

Everyone around you is telling you that you deserve better. A friend invites you to classes at a flamenco studio, your mother offers to change your wardrobe... You timidly agree, slurring that yes, it would be nice, and you will definitely, next time... What prevents you from following these tips right now? Maybe it's self-doubt. It's time for you to learn what low self-esteem is and how to deal with it.

You need to figure out how to get rid of low self-esteem if unpleasant things often happen in your life:

You can’t say “no”, you are afraid that your refusal will offend someone, put them in an awkward position, upset them. At the same time, you are not at all happy to fulfill these requests, and sometimes you are very annoyed that you could not refuse. When a person does something of his own free will, he enjoys it and is pleased with the result.

You care too much about other people's opinions. You worry that someone will talk bad about you, and you are ready to constantly give up your desires for the sake of public opinion. Not believing in your abilities, you are afraid to make a choice, you try to shift the responsibility onto others, asking, “What would you do?” The reverse side of this tactic is criticism of others, because they made the wrong choice for you. But you yourself perceive any comments painfully and see them only as proof of your inferiority.

You really don't know how to take compliments. It is pleasant for you to receive gifts and hear beautiful words addressed to you, but at the same time you feel like an unworthy of praise "liar". You are more accustomed to being a Victim - whining and complaining, counting on sympathy, not admiration.

You are too critical of your appearance: the color of your eyes, hair, waist width, height - all this, in your opinion, is far from ideal. Very rarely do you like yourself in the mirror.

You are unhappy with your environment. Psychologists have long noted that subconsciously insecure people surround themselves with those who constantly confirm their low self-esteem. In the event that you emphasize other people's shortcomings in order to feel better than others, you do not have good friends: they are repelled by your harsh criticism, and often envy and boasting.

If you find signs of low self-esteem in your behavior, take immediate action!

Self-doubt makes you gloomy and irritable, it is dangerous and can ruin your life.

First of all, low self-esteem prevents you from building a successful career and healthy relationships with people. An insecure person often refuses a difficult, interesting job out of fear that he will not succeed. Sometimes it is worth risking your fear and embarking on an adventure, taking on a new task, otherwise you will always be ahead of less capable, but more confident people. If you constantly think that nothing will work out, and you will not succeed, then you will never be able to show your talents and succeed.

Due to low self-esteem, you are afraid of losing love or friendship, and you constantly give in, give up your desires for the sake of someone else's interests. Instead of going to a cafe with a friend, you go with your loved one to a horror movie that he has long wanted to see. Of course, you can't be selfish and think only of yourself, but compromise is a two-way street. Constantly obeying someone else's opinion, you risk losing the respect of loved ones. You are always tense, tormented by anxieties and doubts, you sleep badly. This is very dangerous - this is how neuroses develop, and here you will no longer be able to do without the help of a specialist. In some cases, self-doubt leads to various addictions that destroy health and the psyche in the literal sense.

Constant stress that you experience can cause serious illness.

How to increase self-esteem?

You have already taken the first steps: you have found the main problem and found out why low self-esteem is dangerous. It's time to take action. You will be helped by simple actions that will completely change your life.

Down with perfectionism!

You must understand that ideal people do not exist, and stop reproaching yourself that something is far from perfect. Perfectionism is the other side of self-doubt. Stop telling yourself that if you can’t do it perfectly, there’s no need to start, and remember that athletes train for a very long time and make mistakes before achieving a result.

Conquer your fear

Get rid of the fear of loneliness that affects your relationships with people. The most valuable resource in a person's life is time. Sometimes being alone is very useful: it is an opportunity to relax, calmly make plans for the future and think about ways to implement them, to see new perspectives. Make a list of things that are important to you and never have time for. Instead of going to a boring fashion show with your friends, sit at home with an interesting book. If you like to cook, then find a new recipe and cook it for yourself.

To live life wisely, you need to know a lot.
Two important rules to remember to get started:
You'd rather starve than eat anything
And it's better to be alone than with just anyone.

Omar Khayyam

Don't praise yourself...

When dealing with low self-esteem, it is useful to praise yourself for any, even minor success. Have you solved a difficult problem? Great, let yourself enjoy the feeling of victory. The usual tidying up of the house should be a reason for joy: calmly and slowly make a cup of tea or coffee and sit in a beautiful and cozy kitchen or room, slowly, experiencing a sense of satisfaction from a job well done.

Accept compliments with dignity

Stop being embarrassed, mumble indistinctly that it somehow turned out that way, it’s better to calmly and with a smile thank you for the good words. You deserve them, no doubt about it! If you constantly deny your own successes out of false modesty, then they will simply cease to be noticed. When you begin to value yourself, your time and your work, the opinions of others will also change.

To build on your success in dealing with insecurities, find a job that you can do great.

You sang well as a child - try to go with your friends to a karaoke bar. If you like to draw, then sign up for an art studio. Perhaps you will surprise everyone with your talents, and in any case, you will enjoy and have many new experiences.

Be prepared for the fact that not everyone around you will support you in the fight against low self-esteem.

Perhaps your friend is used to being bright and witty against your background, and the boss is accustomed to loading the trouble-free "gray mouse" with additional work. Your man is sure that you are always waiting for him, and it does not matter that he is four hours late every time, because he decided to sit with friends, despite your plans for the evening. Such people can interfere with you on the way to your goal in many ways: having long conversations about your shortcomings, making critical remarks about your appearance, and sometimes reproaching you for “before you were better.” That's a lie - you were just "easier to use". Such relationships should be broken off as quickly as possible without any regrets.

Toilet paper, pasta, canned food, soap are just some of the items that are rapidly disappearing from supermarket shelves in the midst of the coronavirus outbreak. Let's call a spade a spade: it's not buying out of necessity, but buying out of panic. And although this is a completely understandable reaction of people to an uncertain situation, it does not affect the lives of others in the best way.

The level of self-esteem in one way or another affects the actions of a person. A person constantly underestimates his capabilities, as a result, “life prizes” go to others. If your self-esteem is getting lower and lower, then the 20 tips in this article will help you. By starting to apply them in your life, you can increase your self-esteem and become a confident person.

Many will agree that, from time to time, they are overwhelmed by unwanted thoughts that cannot be rid of. They are so strong that even doing interesting things does not help at all. This is accompanied by negative emotions that add to the painful sensations. Sometimes it seems that it is not possible to defeat such thoughts, but if you consider the problem from different points of view, you can find the right solution.

We kill our happiness with our own hands. The negative that we carry in ourselves towards others, destructive thoughts, envy, anger, resentment - this list is endless. Review your life, let go of unpleasant memories, get rid of people, activities and things that poison the mind. Be good and positive. Do something nice, something that you have long dreamed of.

A person's life changes with age, desires and priorities change. This is a completely normal process, although each of us is individual. If you want to make the most of your life after 30, the following 9 tips will help you.

The fight against complexes is often very difficult due to lack of motivation. And in order to achieve the maximum effect in the fight against complexes, it is necessary to develop a tactic for finding the necessary motivation and further actions. It is on such joint work that the principle of working on oneself is built.

Happiness - no matter what anyone says, the goal of life of every person. But is it so difficult to achieve this goal? People strive to become happy, but they neglect simple joys, which together can give this feeling. Here are some ways to help you feel happier.

Do you want to become a healthy person? If you follow the advice given in this article, then you can say with full confidence that you will become healthier than you were before. At first glance, they seem simple, but start doing them and you will be amazed at the real changes in your health and condition.

Resentment is not an incorrigible, pathological character trait, it can and should be corrected. Resentment is a person's reaction to a discrepancy with his expectations. It can be anything: a word, an act, or a sharp glance. Frequent grievances lead to bodily illnesses, psychological problems and the inability to build harmonious relationships with others. Do you want to stop being offended and learn to understand your grievances? Then let's look at how this can be done.